what the................

okay so i dont want to sound ungrateful or anything cuz lord knows that im not.  BUT i do not want to continue to be like this.  cuz my whole life has been full of jaded or partial compliments.  i feel that the reason that you and i have been the way that we are has to do with the fact that there has been no one to say "you deal with her" to.  with the girls and my bro, you always had something with their dad but not wit mine.  deep down, i feel that the reason that its like it is is cuz he left you and you left all the others.  so since you didnt control that situation, you project that onto me.  see it dont seem so nice when you have other people using psychology on ya does it, but the truth hurts i guess huh?  i will admit to the high heavens that im a pack rat and its hard to get rid of things.  i have had so much happen to me that ive become a control freak is because of that reason.  everything else is in such utter chaos that that is the one thing that i can control.  i have never and will never try to put on a front that im as normal as they come cuz im not.  i just wish that i dont have the same relationship with my kids especially my daughters that you and i have because you were great for my brother and sisters.  me, not so much.  so you put on airs, you front to prove a point to others.  i will continue to be me, as flawed and jaded as i am.....

The Prime or the Base?

ok so today im off from work (yea!) so im gonna try and do a lil catchup.  i have a few products that ive purchased to say that i really like and wanna give you my impression on them.  what is gonna be covered in this particular blog both with and without pictures.  this blog is gonna cover my impressions on eyeshadow primers and bases.  i have purchased urban decay primer potion, l'oreal decrease and nyx eyeshadow base.  this is just the introduction cuz these have already bee done.  im just gonna add each individual one on here.  so there will be 3 seperate reviews posted and uploaded today.  ciao!

Its been a LONG TIME

Okay everybody I know that I've been gone for a long time and have not added anything to this blog of mine and i apologize.  Im really sorry bout it.  Just mainly has to do wit the fact that Ive been so focused on my kids, workin and basically workin on gettin well.  So as those of you who know me personally know that I stopped my meds (against dr.'s wishes cuz I've gained so much weight) and the new focus is how to stop the fatassed-ness.  well I will make sure to blog everyday from now on cuz i need a new venting system and this is it.  Oh, and i have some news to share about what Im doin in my personal  life so there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!